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I have been with my
boyfriend for 4 years now and he has been divorced for over 8 years,
although his ex wife or the X as he calls her doesn't seem to think so.
They do have children together a 17 year old boy (always in trouble) and a
9 year old daughter (who is a daddy's girl). Now don't get me wrong but
yes I did know he had kids and an ex wife when we got together but no one
told me how hard it would be and if they had I quite frankly would have
run for the hills!!
In the early stages of our
relationship it didn't affect me at all, it was only when we moved in
together that it all started to bug me. The teenager from hell lived
with his dad (my boyfriend) as at the time the X couldn't cope with her
son and she had the advantage of being able to choose when she wanted to
be a mother to her son. Anyway eventually after a couple of years of again
hell living with a teenager, ie, police knocking on doors, vandalism,
stealing from me and his dad, taking my cigarettes, alcohol going missing,
not coming home, tantrums sulking you name it, the X decided that she
missed her son and wanted him back, so she got him, but it only lasted a
few months as he was nasty to her new boyfriend, again he came back to us.
This went on to and fro the
son went at the whim of the X. The little girl by the way stays with us 2
nights a week and all day Saturday every week. At Christmas we have
her every other day so actually we hardly ever have a week when we have
just me and him.
Anyway, the exwife has on
several occasions ended up in hospital, usually when my boyfriend and I
decide to have a weekend away. She has again been married and is in
the process of getting divorced from husband number 2, and who could blame
him? Basically when things are going well for her and her
relationships she leaves my boyfriend to get on with his life and gives
him hardly any trouble, but when her life isn't to her liking then he is
the one who has to pay financially and emotionally.
For example, one text of
hers read, "I am overdrawn in the bank as your money went in a day late
and I am going to get charged". Guess who wanted to pay her bank
charges? Bearing in mind he also gives her a bit of cash as well,
which is a fair bit.
Just recently when she saw
me and him together. A couple of days later she phoned him at work
and said he was having both kids as she was going to kill herself.
Four days later she tells him she is okay now and apologises. That
was good of her, wasn't it?
Is it normal for us to be
living only half a mile from her? And does she have to call him
everyday except on Sundays? Lucky us! Get this, she called my
boyfriend on her wedding night to hubby number 2, is that normal or am I
just not supportive enough to the fact that "SHE IS THE MOTHER OF HIS KIDS
U KNOW!!! The next person to say that really needs to be quiet and
go through it themselves.
My poor boyfriend is stuck
in the middle, but I am the one he is with not her, so there really is no
middle is there? Oh yeah, she is the mother of his kids so if she
sits on her backside he will always bail her out, is another example of
what I get told by my bloke. He still buys her Mother's Day gifts
from the kids, which he is doing for the kids, so he says, but she firmly
believes he is doing it for her, as another text I read from her to him
was " thank you for making Mother's Day so special! XX" I mean, what
made it so special for her I ask? Anyway he no longer tells me when
he gives her extra money or when he buys her flowers for Mother's Day as I
get a little angry.
There is more but hey that
women takes up enough of my time as it is. In a nutshell I will
always come second, but I have not become the second wife, as he doesn't
want me to take him for half of everything like she did.
Ex wives, should all vanish.
